So, i went for another round of IUI in Dec 2020.. and it was not succcessful. As IUI was too painful and tramautising for me, we decided to try TCM in 2021. In the 2nd round of IUI, it took 3 tries for the doctor to insert in properly, and it bled and i was greatly shaken. Till today, there is no good news yet. *thunderstorm and lightning flashes* LOL
It is indeed sad and disheartening that we have tried different ways to no results. Doctors say that we are fine, (though they did mentioned that we need to be less stress and exercise)
So after trying for kids for a while (many years in fact), i have decided, I am not going to focus on this in Year 2022!
Instead of wondering if i might be pregnant (Every Month), thus not daring to exercise to the fullest, not able to drink tea/watermelon/ice water/sashimi in peace, i have decided to surrender this area, and leave it to God.
This is something i can't control, so i am leaving it to Him. I trust Him 100% that He is a good Father, as He has shown me faithfully in the different areas of my life. (Turning it 180 degrees around from the first time i was saved at 17) There were too many situations where i realised that He knows me even better than i know myself, so i am in good hands, whatever the outcome may be.
It's hard to believe, but I really trust that the baby will come in God's timing. Yes, no doubt there are disappointments, but i trust and know that His timing will be the best timing for us. =') Your will be done God, not mine. :')
On my end, i will do what i can control, which is to exercise and keep myself healthy.
I have gained about 10kg after marriage, due to yummy food and letting go. *heave a big grandma sigh*
Well meaning friends have advised me to do something about it, for my health especially.. and the truth does hurt, i can't agree more!
Having high cholestrol, and feeling pain in the heart at times, breathlessness even, has prompted and woken me up.
In the last few months of 2021, God also showed me gently that i have to really change from a sedentary lifestyle, to leading a more active/self-disciplined lifesytle, for my own good.
LOL i sound like i was such a lazy person above, yes in the area of exercise i was really lacking motivation. But, it did get better in the 2nd late half of 2021! *try to save my reputation*
In the second half of 2021, i managed to clock 56,000 steps for an ActiveSG T shirt that says "Conqueror", because i wanted the T-shirt SOOOO much. :P Also, we clocked 56km in 4 months and got a medal+t shirt+singlet. Every other Mondays, i have also tried to exercise 1 hour.
It's amazing how much motivation i can get from apparals/medals like this. :)
So, i started with a HUGE goal this year, i want to change my life totally, to exercising 3-4times a week!! No longer just for losing weight, but more to improve my health, and to keep a better shape/stronger mind.
I pray hard that He will give me the motivation, energy, and help to change my life around, to become a much fitter person, that i always dream of.
Like what Pastor shared yesterday, many of us, "READY, GET SET", "READY, GET SET", "READY, GET SET", and never GO! We need to really take action and GO!!
I felt like it was totally my situation, because i do plan alot but just no consistent action.
So this time round, i am determined! Onward to a fitter MF. :)
Going to take a health check up at the end of April. From now till then, I shall work hard to execise more! :)
Also, i have decided that i was spending WAY too much time on FB, Instagram, so i am going on a fast in those 2 social media platforms. (I know blogging is also Social media, but it's a start la! ;)
With the time saved from aimless scrolling, i would have more time going back to my first love: blogging and writing.
And this time, it will not be blogging for others,(nobody is reading it since it was dead for a long time) but more for articulating what i feel on the inside, and journaling down life, so that i could look back at how much the tone of the posts have changed, and growth (if any) in years to come. :)
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ONWARD to a fitter 2022! Let's talk about babies again at the end of 2022. :)
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